What Google and AI Can’t Tell You About Perimenopause—But Human Design Can

Exhaustion beneath Exhaustion

I've had nights where I was awake at 3 am, looking out at the stars, wondering if this mid-night wake-up thing was a gift of sorts.

I wouldn't see the stars and feel the stillness if I wasn't awake, after all.

But still, night after night of waking up--that feeling when it first happens where I'm still trying to hold onto sleep but my body is like, "Nope! We are UP, sister"--it does take a toll.

Because we are aging. We don't bounce back like we used to when we birthed our babies and were awake all hours of the night but functioning like Superwoman during the day. (btw, how the hell did we ever do that?)

That time watching the stars though, I was entertaining thoughts about the woman I was becoming, the changes in my body that constantly challenge my self-love, and wondering why I was feeling so...broken.

My inner compass had felt so tuned all of my life--school, job, marriage, kids...and now, things were no longer clear.

Why So Many Women Outsource Their Inner Knowing During This Phase

It's easy to see why we go searching for things like, "midlife crisis," "why can't I sleep in perimenopause?" and "existential crisis" when we're wide awake in the early morning hours.

It's so quiet.

It's so private.

We can go incognito mode and ask Google or Chatty all of the deepest, darkest questions our exhausted heads can imagine.

We can find other women online (Hi, Reddit communities!) who are experiencing the same symptoms, and even if we can't sleep, we can at least feel less alone.

Because the messages that we've been fed for YEARSssssss (like "be a nice girl" and "working hard is admirable" and "be grateful for what you have--wanting more is selfish") weigh on us. They're baked into our DNA and when they meet up with our fluctuating hormones...

it's the perfect recipe for self doubt.

And for those of us with some openness in our Human Design, all of those centers are constant reminders of the "shoulds."

⭐ Get your chart here if you need a reminder of your open/undefined centers. They will be the white shapes in your chart.

Overwhelm to Overconsumption to Burnout

The fact is, we're tired, confused, and probably a little desperate.

So we start doing what we’ve all been conditioned to do when something feels off:

go looking for a fix. We figure we're smart, determined women--we ought to be able to figure this out.

Another supplement.

A new podcast.

A breathwork technique we saw in a reel (but of course, can’t quite remember).

Maybe you download three free guides from three different wellness coaches that now sit unopened in your inbox, promising promising better sleep, hormone balance, and less anxiety—but just reading the email subject lines makes you feel more behind.

And then we blame ourselves for not being able to “stick with it.”

We think maybe we’re not disciplined enough. Or not serious enough about our healing. Or that this is just part of life and we have to deal with it.

But what if we are not the problem?

What if we’ve simply been overconsuming in an attempt to fix something that was never broken—just deeply misaligned?

Because this is what happens when overwhelm meets self-doubt:

You start grabbing for everything, hoping something will click.

But instead, you end up in a state of burnout so deep that even healing feels exhausting.

We lose the capacity to discern what’s actually ours to hold and what we’ve picked up because someone else said it worked for them.

How Human Design is a Map Back to Yourself

At some point in this midlife unraveling, we start to wonder not just what’s happening to my body? but who am I now that everything familiar feels foreign?

And that’s where Human Design comes in.

Not as another “system” to follow.

Not as a fix.

But as a map.

A compass.

A tool that reflects you back to yourself—before the conditioning, the striving, the expectations, the roles.

It’s not about boxes or binaries.

It’s about energy.

Yours.

In the latest Midlife by Design episode, "What Google and AI Can’t Tell You About Perimenopause (But Human Design Can)", I take a look at perimeno struggles through the lens of Human Design—and why the “advice” you’ve been trying might feel like it’s making things worse.

For example:

• Generators and Manifesting Generators need to respond, not initiate. But everything in our culture teaches them to push.

• Projectors are here to guide, not grind. But most women have been rewarded for burning out!

• Manifestors need peace to access their urges—but are constantly interrupted.

• And Reflectors need spaciousness and lunar cycles to find clarity. Try fitting that into a productivity planner.

  
  

So when your body says “no more,” maybe it’s not failing you. Maybe it's finally speaking to you, and your Human Design chart is the language it’s been waiting for you to learn.

Listen to this week's episode on You Tube, Spotify, or your favorite pod platform. Let me know what resonated!

You’re Not Broken. You’re Remembering.

What if perimenopause isn’t the crisis we’ve been taught to fear, but the invitation we’ve been avoiding?

What if this is the moment you begin unbecoming the woman you had to be for everyone else, and start becoming the woman you actually are?

It’s not about fixing.

It’s about remembering and reclaiming the beautiful woman you were always meant to be.

Which is why the first thing I often tell women isn’t: “Here’s what to do.”

It’s: “Let’s look at what’s true for you.”

💌 That’s exactly what the Perimenopause Survival Guide is designed to do.

You’ll get a personalized, type-specific roadmap that helps you understand what your symptoms are trying to tell you—and how to support yourself without outsourcing your inner knowing.

Or, if you want to talk it through, you can book a free Midlife Mapping Call and we’ll walk through what your chart is showing you, together.

You’re not here to keep pretending you’re okay.

You’re here to rewire what “okay” even means.

Let’s begin.